Ashellie's Book of Poetry

Utena Ending

Missing truth and forever,
Kiss love.
Hold me tight with your arms so true.
The key to unlock tomorrow is reality.
I want to keep on smashing lies apart
No much the two of us talk…
You still just can’t see anything
Excuses are fitting for adults
Who just cling to old stories.
The angels who passed away,
Don’t need their wings to fly!
Missing truth and forever,
Kissing love and true your heart.
I like who I’ll be tomorrow and…
I’ll believe in myself
Because I want to believe.
I want to keep hating lies.

Ashley (Rowan’s POV)

Hidden beauty, beyond those hazel eyes.
A soft voice, comes from those pink lips.
Her heart so pure, she forgives all the lies.
She has a gentle touch, a caress on fingertips.
Her smile, scares away all the fears.
Her soft skin, softer then the touch of silk.
My hand against her cheek, she needs no tears.
Her skin, almost as white as milk.
She gives me every reason to be alive.
I feel her heart beat in unison with my own.
She holds my heart, she’s the reason love will survive.
In her arms, eyes and kiss, my true love is shown.

Rowan

Deep within those turquoise eyes,
I get lost in his kiss.
I’ll always forgive his lies
And there’s not one I’ll miss.
He holds me so very tight
Giving out his comfort and love.
He makes everything wrong, so right.
His hugs, his kisses I just can’t get enough.
He’s the whole reason I’m alive.
He’s a cute thief, who stole my heart.
If I should ever start to die, for him alone I will survive.
His eyes locked with mine, our hearts bound even apart.

I Will Love You Forever

I love you so deeply;
I love you so much;
I love the sound of your voice,
And the way that we touch.
I love your warm smile,
And your kind, thoughtful way,
The joy that you bring to my life everyday.
I love you today as I have from the start,
And I’ll love you forever with all of my heart.

Kimika’s Chant

I must’ve dreamed a million dreams,
Been haunted by a million screams.
On that terrifying day,
I watched my life fade away.
I am the keeper of the sun.
This is no time for a lousy pun.
Wolves hidden in the night,
Ready to strike a bite.
Flames, here, a light,
Deep within the night.

Her love protects her. Her sister heals her. Her brothers are her angels.

A Guardian- Her Love
A Healer- Her Sister
A Symbol- The Sun
A Gang- Her Brothers
The Princess- Kimi

The Day the World Died

The sky was blue, the sun was high.
The young, the old. The rich, the poor.
Starting out, the brand new day.
But as they opened their eyes,
The world died..

Buildings crumbled, people screamed.
Black smoke filled the air, pieces fell to the ground.
People scrambled, heroes trembled.
The date was September 11, 2001.

9/11 was the day the world died.
Tears fell like rain from our eyes,
Searching for survivors, burying the dead.
Heroes and citizens perished.

The world died before our eyes.
Is there a chance to rebuild it?
Is there a chance to fix it?
Is there a chance… at all?

The day the world died, was caused by one man.
One group.
One society.
They need to be stopped, but how?
We cannot let our world die again.

This is our land.
This is our home.
This is America.

The day the world died,
Will never come again.
We won’t let it come again.
This is where we belong, and this is where we’ll stay.

Never Have I Fallen

Your lips speak a soft sweetness,
Your touch a cool caress.
I am lost in your magic,
My heart beats within your chest.

I think of you each morning
And I dream of you each night.
I think of your arms being around me
And cannot express my delight.

Never have I fallen
But I am quickly on my way.
You hold a heart in your hands,
That has never before been given away.

When Ice Burns

Is it really true
That you cannot miss
What you have never had?

This is a drama that never took place.
Where the girl loved a boy
As much as she hates him.
The boy has a brother who hates him, too.

They are not to be together, the girl and the boy’s brother.
But that does not mean
That they won’t.

And if they move apart,
They will never have had each other
But
Is it really true
That they will never
Miss
Each other?

Unbalanced Kisses

Within a broken mirror, I clearly see your reflection.
Tears roll down your face… Tears roll down your face…
As your finger traces the edge of the new moon,
Who is that I’m calling out to?
I can see you walk away from me,
Time and time again… Time and time again…
You’ll find me knocking at your door,
With my back pressed against the weight of the world
And the speed of the night.
It felt as if a thread was snapping in two
And I held onto you… Held onto you… Held onto you…
With all my might.
As you share an unbalanced kiss with me,
I hope you feel us getting closer to love.
And may your fear and tearful deceptions come to rest in my heart.
Oh, my love…

I Can Hear a Whistle

I can hear a whistling farther than yesterday
I collect the scattered pieces
I hold them tightly in my right hand, and softly close my eyes
Knife-like moonlight rains down
On a night that freezes even the horizon
Alone in the wilderness, hugging my knee
I strain to hear the song of the wind
Those who do not know a sleepless night
Cannot become strong; that is the rule
I can hear whistling farther than the stars and the skies
It’s the words of someone’s prayer
I hold them tightly in my right hand, and softly close my eyes
A thing that’s sadder than loneliness
No matter how freezing the night, under the earth
Warmth is hidden
Rather than being a bird that is trapped in a cage
I would become a nameless stone
I can hear a whistling farther than yesterday
I collect the scattered pieces
And holding them tight in my right hand, I softly close my eyes
I can hear a whistling from a distant yesterday
It’s the words of someone’s prayer
And holding them tight in my right hand, I softly close my eyes
Holding them tight in my right hand, I softly close my eyes…

Aria of the Stare

Don’t underestimate this power
You shallow-brained fools
Don’t stare at my Jagan
With your evil looks
Surely there’s nothing to fear.
Loneliness becomes used to my soul
Only getting a cold anger,
Flying like the flapping of the winds of the north.
Lightning… fades
Egoists leave this place now
“Be silent!”
Do not underestimate this spirit
You disgusting imps!
Quit this squirming
No longer on this earth
I was born to fight, so don’t speak to me of love
My stare, however, is a murderous weapon, fighting like a whirlwind
Reflecting on your presence
I pierce your deception
“Be silent!”
Don’t underestimate this power
You shallow-brained fools
Don’t stare at my Jagan
With your evil looks
Surely there’s nothing to fear.
Loneliness becomes used to my soul
Only getting a cold anger,
Flying like the flapping of the winds of the north
Lightning… fades
Egoists leave this place now
The blazing instinct in my eye sings the silent Aria
“Be Silent!”

Wild Wind

Hiei: The wind races, a silent hurricane calling me.
It’s probably a sign, a signal of decisive battle.

Kurama: Yes, the day has come for
The dream that’s more important than my life to be fulfilled.

Both: With my heart like this, I’m just fighting to dream.
I won’t let anyone get in my way.
We can decide things like fate for ourselves.
Like the wind, we’re just shooting to dream.
Cutting off the pain of the past,
We now decide the future with our own hands.
Getta chance!

Hiei: The painful dream spurs me on,
As if to fan the fire left in my cold heart.

Kurama: Yes, burning emotions resound in my heart,
Like an unending storm.

Both: Like the wilderness, we’re now fighting to dream.
Burying despair and such,
We run fiercely, swiftly down the path of the beast.
Becoming the wind, we’re now shooting to dream.
Our desire is freedom.
We can’t deceive our own hearts.
It’s truth!

Both: With my heart like this, I’m just fighting to dream.
I won’t let anyone get in my way.
We can decide things like fate for ourselves.
Like the wind, we’re just shooting to dream.
Cutting off the pain of the past,
We now decide the future with our own hands.
Getta chance!

Sayonara Bye Bye

I feel my aching heart about to break,
The gentle wind that blows fills the air with peacefulness,
We’re standing face to face,
Hand in hand,
And then the evening twilight drapes its arms around us,
And it melts away,
It’s just so funny,
Your smiling face and mine,
They’re not the same,
But for right now it’s as though I’m looking in a mirror,
And everything is fine,
No sadness at all,
So now I draw the line to live another journey,
Cause even though we’ve been here together,
We’re still different people,
But we’re not alone,
Sayonara bye bye,
Please take care of yourself,
Cause even though we’ve been here together,
We’re still different people,
But we’re not alone,
Sayonara bye bye,
Please take care of yourself…

Love Always Finds a Way

Free me of your spell
Can’t you see that it tortures me?
Even with eyes shut in darkness
Your image stands before me
No longer is there a minute
That I do not see your almond eyes
Or that I do not dwell upon your words
My longing has become eternal
Every thought encloses you
I used to long for love
And now that I have it,
It’s becoming my hate
Reality keeps us apart
Do you know of what I’ve become?
For days I go sleepless
Staring, staring
At just a picture
Insanity has finally wrought its inevitable reign
Oh I hate this love, our passion
And I long for the peace
That will never come
For without it I sink into the darkening pit of loneliness
And that is far much worse
I’m caught in a trap
Your heaven has become my hell
And my heaven
All I can do now is hold you
You tell me “Together we’ll make it work,
Love always finds a way.”

Zetsumei (Death)

I am sleeping, as the dead sleep.

My body is nothing, but ash, resting quietly in an urn in the earth.
Defiled ash, mixed with the charred sands that are all that remain of the Shikon no Tama.

Forever intertwined, never able to escape.

And still my soul weeps, trapped in a flaming inferno, where I am not burned.
Not even warmed, but instead frozen, colder than anything I could have imagined.
So very cold, this breeze of loneliness.

Because he is not here.

I murdered him with my own two hands,
Just as he murdered me with his.

I did not die so I could be alone,
I killed him so I couldn’t be alone.

That was my duty.

But.

Where is Inuyasha?

Inuyasha, Inuyasha, Inuyasha.

Where are you, Inuyasha…?

Why are you not here, dead with me?

Are you still alive, then, living in the world of the living? With the animals living in the forests, with people raising families in villages, with youkai ravaging those same families?

Inuyasha, Inuyasha, Inuyasha. Damn you, Inuyasha.

Damn you for destroying my village. Damn you for stealing the Shikon no Tama. Damn you for breaking your promise.

Damn you for leaving me alone.

Damn you, damn you, damn you.

I damn you.

Because you betrayed me. That I can never forgive.

Why did you murder me? Tearing your claws down my back, letting my blood soak into them. I never wanted that. I never knew you wished for that. Why did you steal the Shikon no Tama? I protect it from ones like you.

Protected.

I failed.

Damn you, damn you, damn you, Inuyasha.

I had no other loves, so I have no one else to compare you to. But no one ever can.

Inuyasha, Inuyasha. I am weeping for you, you who betrayed me, who left me here in darkness, hidden from the light.
I am only human, Inuyasha.

And alone…

Remember?

No, you don’t, do you?

You will lie pinned to the tree for all eternity, Inuyasha. And I will sit here in the darkness, thrown away from brightness. For all eternity, Inuyasha.

I saw light for the briefest moments, a flash of warmth that I treasured and chased.

I will never see light again.

For I will never see you again.

I am glad.

Damn you, Inuyasha. Damn you, damn you, damn you.

If I damn you enough, my love, will you come here and join me?

Every Heart

Tell me babe, how many do I shed my tears?
Every heart. Every heart is not a gentle yet.

Shall I do? I can never say my loneliness.
Every heart, doesn’t know so what to say oh what to do

(I) was afraid of darkness cause I felt that I was left alone
So I prayed for help to (the) distant million stars

Round and round the planets revolve round the sun
And we always seek after love and peace forever more
Growing growing woe baby we can work it out
Look up at the sky every heart is shining all today

Show me now, what kind of smile do I come across?
Every heart every heart can take a step towards the dreams

All of us want to take a lasting happiness
Whenever you feel sad, I wanna hold you and give you a sound sleep

Someday every hearts gonna free and easy
We have peace of mind
Someday all the people find a way to love

Goes and goes the time goes on we are not alone
We live on together and we will find some precious things
Sometime we will smile sometime we will cry somehow
Don’t forget believing yourself- tomorrow’s never die

There is the warm heart places on my mind
In my earliest days there and it’s so sweet
There are many stars they have talked with me so kindly
They say yes always time’s a friend of mine so shine.

Round and round the planets revolve round the sun
And we always seek after love and peace forever more
Growing growing woe baby we can work it out
Look up at the sky every heart is shining all today

Goes and goes the time goes on we are not alone
We live on together and we will find some precious things.
Sometime we will smile sometime well cry somehow
Don’t forget believing yourself- tomorrow’s never die

Fukai Mori
[verse 1]
I’m sure that the heart I left behind
Still lies hidden in the heart of the deep, deep forest.

Exhausted without the strength to search
People vanish into the infinite darkness

If it’s so small, I wonder if I can see it even now?

[chorus]
As we live on,
We lose a little bit more.
Shrouded in falsehoods and lies
We stand frozen to the spot, unable to cry out

[verse 2]
The days pass by and change,
Without us even realizing how blue the sky really is

Overcoming that made-up scheme, we live the present,
And our rusted hearts begin to beat again!

If we can find the rhythm of time, we can fly once again

We live our lives
Wandering to the ends of the earth
Believing (in you?), now I begin my journey with you,
In search of the light

[repeat chorus]

[verse 3]

We live our lives
Wandering to the ends of the earth
Closing off
The way back
We walk on for eternity

We live our lives standing frozen to the spot,
Unable to cry out, for eternity

I’m sure that the heart I left behind
Still lies hidden in the heart of the deep, deep forest…

Utena

When? Where? Who? Which?
When? Where? Who? Which?
The flow of the blood of memories…
The cradle of 1000 years of bliss.
I am an actor.
Just like the sphinx…
… in the eternal winter.
Thinks.
You know the winds of sadness…
… of the body as it’s born and dies.
The holy act, forever…
… forever cast into hell.
A margin of darkness and light.
Shining! Burning!
Awakening! Singing!
Born into the world,
Born into the moment
Over and over again!

Utena 2

Let’s live our lives heroically, let’s live them with style.
Even if the two of us are ever torn apart…
…take my revolution.
In the sunlit garden, we both joined our hands,
Drawing close for comfort we both swore;
Never again would we ever fall in love.
I see that photo of us smiling, standing
Cheek to cheek.
I look at it and a bit of loneliness starts to fill me.
Even if I dream, even if I cry, even if I get hurt…
…. reality keeps on coming recklessly.
I wanna find out where I am, the value of being me.
Gonna take who I’ve been till now…
… and find the strength to throw it all away.
Strip down to nothing at all,
Become like a rose petal blowing free!
Even if the two of us are ever torn apart…
… I swear that I will change the world.

Primal Fury

I’ve got you inside me.
If you hate me, you hate you.
I’ve got you beside me.
If you trap me, you trap you.
I’ve got you within me.
If you slash me, you slash you.
I’ve got you beneath me.
If you smash me, you smash you.

We’re both the same, me and you.
We’re both to blame.
We’re both insane.
We’re both the same.

You can’t live without me.
If you kill me, you kill you.
You won’t care about me.
If you mock me, you mock you.
You don’t look before me.
If you use me, you use you.
You don’t see beyond me.
If you lose me, you lose you.

We’re both the same, me and you.
We’re both to blame.
We’re both insane.
We’re both the same.

All this fury torn and shredded up to me.

Seraph Serenade

(You’re my)
Angel back in heaven
Lost among the free
Trapped up in that tower
Looking down upon my plea
If only I could climb up there,
And sort through your debris
(I’d bring this)
Angel back to heaven
For all eternity

Gritty demented cloth
Covering up flesh born to rot
Lace wound up so tightly and taut
That bitter screams of breath would get caught

Bloody circumcised heel
Kicking in the doors made of steel
Stiletto razor-sharp so surreal
That sunny dreams of death wouldn’t feel

(You’re my)
Angel back in heaven
Lost among the free
Trapped up in that tower
Looking down upon my plea
If only I could climb up there,
And sort through your debris
(I’d bring this)
Angel back to heaven
For all eternity

Dirty penalized belt
Whipping trouble with each pelt
Leather stained so worn it could melt
That haunting demonic rage with one welt

Musky vilified veil
Smothering cries of living hell
Dust choking cries to such avail
That holy waters rise with one wail

(You’re my)
Angel back in heaven
Lost among the free
Trapped up in that tower
Looking down upon my plea
If only I could climb up there,
And sort through your debris
(I’d bring this)
Angel back to heaven
For all eternity

Angel back in heaven
Lost among the free
Trapped up in that tower
Looking down upon my plea
If only I could climb up there
And sort through your debris
Angel back in heave
Captured just for me…

True

I won’t talk
I won’t breathe
I won’t move till you finally see
That you belong with me

You might think
I don’t look
But deep inside the corner of my mind
I’m attached to you

I’m weak
It’s true
Cause I’m afraid to know the answer
Do you want me too?
Cause my heart keeps falling faster

I’ve waited all my life
To cross this line
To the only thing that’s true
So I will not hide
It’s time to try anything to be with you
All my life I’ve waited

This is true

You don’t know
What you do
Every time you walk into the room
I’m afraid to move

I’m weak
It’s true
I’m just scared to know the ending
Do you see me to?
Do you even know you met me?

I’ve waited all my life
To cross this line
To the only thing that’s true
So I will not hide
It’s time to try anything to be with you
All my life I’ve waited

This is true

I know when I go
I’ll be on my way to you
The way that’s true

I’ve waited all my life
To cross this line
To the only thing that’s true
So I will not hide
It’s time to try anything to be with you
All my life I’ve waited

This is true…

I Miss You

I miss you…
… forever and always…

I never count on yesterday
Because the past may not exist
I’ll never give myself away
When there’s reason to resist
Words draped in crystals melt away

Outside, the snow keeps falling
If you’re cold then I’ll come calling
These winter days I find
Seems you’re always on my mind

Oh if you only knew
Just how much I think of you
I might not be so cold
If I had your hand to hold

Alone

I am the voice of sorrow
Hollow and alone
The fault is my own
The end is near
And it’s true
No one will cry as I slowly die
I’m all alone
As I turn to stone
Won’t anyone catch me
Please save me from this misry
My heart radiates the color of despair
And no one seems to care
Forever on my own
Forever and always… alone.

Hidden Soul

Secrets untold
And lives unfold

The secrets I hide from you
Just to make it through

Make it through each night
Even though I know its not right

When you’ve learned what I’ve done
Will you just shun…

Shun me away as if I wasn’t there
All these people stare

Stare at me like I can’t shed a tear
I know and I feel insincere

Why can’t I say them, but I will try
I will just have to learn not to cry

Let’s just try to make it through
Because you need to know I love you